there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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