Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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