Small penises have feelings too.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
