The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
