Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
