halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
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