I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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