TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
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