His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
