***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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