i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize