I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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