if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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