Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
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