I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
