found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
