doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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