you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Randomize
