it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
