Are we in a gay sports bar?
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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