I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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