K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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