Barsexuality is the new black.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
