So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
