In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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