Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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