i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Randomize
