talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
