Can I ask u a weird question?
do u have the hershy squirts too?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.