i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
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the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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