New invention idea: vibrating tampons
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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