I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
