Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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