I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
