I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
