So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
