Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
