I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize