Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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