I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
