I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
