yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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