Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
