Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
we're so committed to being not committed
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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