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• (705): View more from Ontario

  How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?

  (1-705): View more from Ontario

  I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.

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• 

  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (407): View more from Florida

  Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked

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• (415): View more from California

  She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  I just commented on the education level of his penis.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.

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• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Twice...

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• (607): View more from New York

  Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  My vagina is officially offended.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window

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