Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(408): View more from California

i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.

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(408): i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked. http://tfl.nu/0z4b

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(224): View more from Illinois

Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'

(224): View more from Illinois

Im going to research this theory. . .

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(224): Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex' (224): Im going to research this theory. . . http://tfl.nu/7c0k

Replies (47) Good night (3902) Bad night (684)
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(949): View more from California

the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters

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(949): the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters http://tfl.nu/l7fh

Replies (39) Good night (5082) Bad night (1056)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.

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(570): You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol. http://tfl.nu/n8ii

Replies (11) Good night (1001) Bad night (3500)
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(361): View more from Texas

He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.

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(361): He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears. http://tfl.nu/n3l2

Replies (7) Good night (1128) Bad night (2897)
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(719): View more from Colorado

I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.

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(719): I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm. http://tfl.nu/n4fu

Replies (13) Good night (1546) Bad night (1372)
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(708): View more from Illinois

My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.

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(708): My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with. http://tfl.nu/rm3v

Replies (15) Good night (2446) Bad night (833)
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(310): View more from California

Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor

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(310): Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor http://tfl.nu/gni2

Replies (7) Good night (675) Bad night (1082)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.

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(732): Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train. http://tfl.nu/hytn

Replies (4) Good night (990) Bad night (525)
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(319): View more from Iowa

I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.

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(319): I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls. http://tfl.nu/wkuc

Replies (3) Good night (542) Bad night (850)
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(646): View more from New York

Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.

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(646): Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with. http://tfl.nu/g4xi

Replies (5) Good night (676) Bad night (1009)
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(226): View more from Ontario

You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF

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(226): You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF http://tfl.nu/pq8j

Replies (0) Good night (623) Bad night (450)
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(707): View more from California

Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.

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(707): Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful. http://tfl.nu/xs64

Replies (2) Good night (544) Bad night (301)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.

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(203): No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home. http://tfl.nu/r9pd

Replies (2) Good night (524) Bad night (343)
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(905): View more from Ontario

Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle

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(905): Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle http://tfl.nu/fshu

Replies (0) Good night (837) Bad night (206)

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