"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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