Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
