i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
