He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Randomize
