Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
