Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
