That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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